An Open Letter to the Church

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(This post was copied from my wordpress blog)

I've been mulling over my thoughts and feelings for the past few days now and I think I'm finally ready to express what has become a very serious concern for me. So, I present this very open letter to anyone who claims to be a believer in Christ, and more specifically, to the church as an institution.

With everything that has been going on lately, I've really had to re-examine myself and my actions. Consequently, this also led to my observations of the church as a whole. This is where my struggle begins.

We have failed our mandate.

I am grieved by the state of the church today. I weep whenever I see hate, sorrow, anxiety, impatience, harshness, hypocrisy, and pride take priority within the church. We unabashedly spew injustice, legalism, and dogma to those we were called to love and then wonder why church attendance is so low.

How easily we have forgotten that the very core of our story, the Gospel, only begins with the sacrifice Jesus made for us. It continues with his life, his teachings and his examples. He exemplified the very virtues that we should try to uphold every single day: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

He condemned no one, but offered his loving embrace and Truth to anyone who was willing to listen. He had compassion.

Yet, time and time again I watch in horror as those who are supposed to be the embodiment of all this good fall into the exact opposite. How little we cried out against the wrongs of our history, but how quickly we were to point accusatory fingers at others for their wrongs.

We sat idly by as organizations like Westboro Baptist Church openly harassed members of the LGBTQ+ community, and even showed our solidarity with them during events like "Chik-fil-a Day" (Remember that day in 2012?). Or, how about those times we made Kaepernick's peaceful protest about #blacklivesmatter, about him "disrespecting the flag". We ignore the fact (or at least, pretend it's not as bad as it seems), that people are abused and rejected by the church because of some imagined or real sin. If a person makes us uncomfortable, we shut them out.

I have never been more ashamed of my association with the word Christian as I am today. If you happen to be reading this and have been hurt by a "Christian" in any sense of the word then I apologize from the bottom of my heart. The hurt and pain and judgment that has been shown to you is not what Jesus taught and it is appalling that you had (maybe even continue) to experience that. I hope that you can find it in your heart to one day forgive us.

This has to stop.

The strongest evidence that we have failed our neighbor is being evidenced right now by the state of our country. We have allowed racism and politics to pervade our sanctuaries; something that should have never even been tolerated outside of the church, much less in. You want revival to happen in America? Stop judging and start loving. Look at yourself: truly, openly, honestly, and focus on the things that you need to work on and just love those around you.

If we are going to teach and preach that all people are worthy in God's sight, then it's time we actually lived like we mean it.

When asked, Jesus said that the greatest commandments were to love God with all your heart, soul, and mind. In the same sentence he also added, love your neighbor as yourself. There was no caveat, no addendum, no exceptions. Love God, Love People.

We have not been loving our neighbor, and by extension we have not been loving God.

This is my call to action. This is my desperate plea.

Be better.

No longer tolerate injustice. No longer be enslaved to politics. No longer be bogged down by the dogma. No longer let there be a barrier between you and the people you were called to love.

Let us all strive to be more like Jesus. Right now we are so far from it.

In a lot of ways, I feel that we are guilty of far worse than the police officers who have shown just how brutal they can be. At least we know where they stand.

No, we just pretend like nothing is wrong as we savagely rip apart the souls of the downtrodden, the hopeless, and the weary. Instead of being a refuge, we have become a snake pit.

If Jesus were to give his speech to the Pharisees today, it would be aimed at us. I honestly think we would be the ones to be driven out of the temple with the whip. There is no place in God's kingdom for what the church has become.

Doesn't that make you weep?

You can try to justify, or argue. You can write me off completely. But I think deep down we all know the truth.

We must be better.

Grace and Peace.

Positing on Grace

I have been thinking about grace a lot lately.  In fact, I have been meaning to write my thoughts on it about two weeks ago but I allowed other things to consume my time and attention. Naturally, I suppose it's best to start with a definition of what I mean by grace.  I looked at a few definitions but none of them really fit what I am talking about. They are not bad definitions by any means but it also isn't quite what I had in mind. So here is what I've come up with in hopes of simple clarification.

Grace - Unearned, undeserved, and unachievable favor granted to another because of a genuine love held for that other.

I kept the divine out of my definition because I do believe it is possible for someone to show this grace to another; usually it goes hand in hand with mercy but evidence does exist.  However, I am referring specifically to the divine; God's grace in regards to humanity.

Something that has occurred to me lately is that the only religion (that I am aware of) that preaches grace is Christianity.  The rest all teach good works, or some type of deed that has to be accomplished.  Do so many prayers, perform so many good deeds, give so much money and maybe, just -maybe-, it will be enough to get another life, the after-life, the heaven equivalent.  On the other end, Christianity preaches that there isn't a need for good works to reach eternal life, that we are granted this entrance by simply believing that Jesus was who he said he was and allowing him to be the Lord in our life.

Just reading over the previous description makes me feel that it is pretty obvious that this good works mindset can be pretty stressful since there really isn't even any type of guarantee of success, whereas allowing this Jesus power to do all the redeeming required to enter into that heaven is much more freeing.

I realize that previous statement is probably incredibly subjective, but the heart of the question and point remains: Do the work ourselves, or let someone else do it for us?

I'm sure that my readers know by now, but I truly believe there is nothing we can do that will ever be enough to gain the rights to an eternal life.  Just taking a look at the news on any given day and you can see how messed up humanity really is.  We constantly compare ourselves to others to justify our own lifestyle choices.  I can attest that I have had my own thoughts of "Well, at least I don't do [that]"  or "-I- would never," etc.  And if we are honest with ourselves, we've all got things we don't want others to know about because we know we aren't as good as we like to pretend we are.  In short, if we rely on our own power and goodness we fall horribly, horribly short with no hope of success.

But, that's the bad news.

The good news is the message of grace.

I'm sure you've all heard it.  Jesus, also called Christ by many, came to earth living a righteous, perfect, sinless life and acted as the end all solution for humanity so that eternal life becomes attainable.  Jesus does all the work on our behalf and through his intercession we have hope.

That is the true beauty of Grace.  We don't have to stress ourselves out trying and trying to be enough.  It will never happen.  However, God's grace through Jesus makes us enough.  When we come to understand and accept this then we find that we can do and be good because we want to.  Because, we are so changed by the grace that has saved us from a life enslave by worry and hopelessness, that we can't help but share the grace, peace, and hope that we experience.

You see, I believe there is this huge misconception about Christianity.  Many believe it is this huge list of rules and thus you can't have any fun but I find the opposite to be true.  These aren't rules I have to follow.  I -choose- to do so because it is the least I can do for the person who saved me and saves me daily.  What's more it is my pleasure to do so because it benefits not only me but those around me.

After all, Grace, peace and Love is and has always been the message.

Grace and Peace.

Lord, My God, My Father

Lord, my God, my Father,
How awesome and wonderful you are;
Who knows me from the inside out
Who created each and every star.

My heart is burdened,
Weighed down by what I must do.
Though I cannot see the path ahead
I know you will lead me through.

Grant your servant guidance and wisdom;
Bestow upon him your courage and peace.
Empty him of all himself
So that, in him, you may increase.

At a loss for words,
I stand before your throne.
There are no answers to my questions;
There is only you, and you alone.

Lord, my God, my Father,
Let all creation sing your praise!
May my humble voice bring you joy
Let your glory fill this place!

Paradox Complex: Good but Bad?

Christianity is full of paradoxes.  Everything that is taught seems to go against what comes natural to us.  We are told to go against the stream and be different, but so many (including myself) fall so short so often.  One of the paradoxes I wanted to touch on today was one of Humans being good, but also being bad (sinful, evil, etc.)

I think there is a common misconception that permeates around Christian culture like a plague.  People feel worthless and vile like they are worst people that have ever existed.  They can often be self-defeating and too self-demanding and I suspect a lot of it stems from what we are taught in churches more often than not nowadays.  I’m sure you’ve all heard it before.

“We are born with no goodness in us!”  “We deserve God’s wrath.” “There isn’t a day that goes by that we aren’t sinning against God somehow.”

While I won’t argue that these statements are false, I think we forget sometimes that God does not create bad things.  So we find ourselves being beaten over the head with our failures by our own selves and perceive our pastors, and other church members to be doing the same.  But we are so much more than the sum of our faults.

When God created the known universe he looked at it and saw that it was good (see the first two chapters of Genesis).  He saw it, and said it himself, “this is good.”  He created a beautiful masterpiece of art that continues to shift and change and shine to this day.

Because Humanity is good.

People are beautiful, the ability to reason, to create, and to renew is astounding.  Relationships are messy but wonderful, community is inspiring (when it’s done right).  Intimacy is vulnerable but so satisfying. 

Humanity is good, just like the rest of creation.

But then the first sin happened, and the whole world was turned upside down because of it.

Humans didn’t stop being good, but the conditions of their souls became one of death and sin.  We became “bad”.  People started to become jealous of one another, they murdered in cold blood, they proved unfaithful time and time again to their own friends and family and they turned away from the very being who created them.

I think we can all admit that we have problems.  Many people refuse to admit their problems, ignore them, or are unaware of them, but at the end of the day we all know we are a screwed up race.  People will say “I’m a pretty good person,” but really they are just comparing one small aspect of their life to someone else’s and judging subjectively if they do it better.

There is a little evil in all of us, but luckily most people know how to reign it in and keep it in check (for the most part, after all, no one is perfect right?)  But despite all of the flaws and scars and wounds that we cover up, people are still beautiful.  Granted that beauty is only a fraction of what it could be, but beautiful nonetheless.

There are still mothers who care deeply for their children, lovers who give up everything for each other, scholars and poets who reason and create and encourage that of others, and musicians who form emotions and convey a message not only in lyrics but also in the sounds produced from their instruments.  There are moments of just pure good that still exist in this world; creation hasn’t become bad, just because we have tainted it with our fingerprints.

Humanity is good, our souls are in bad shape and need help.

Two cents for the day.

Grace and Peace

Anger: A Problem or Catalyst?

As I write this I can see the gentle falling of the rain outside through the window nearby.  I find myself wishing I was out there rather than in here.  To just sit and soak for a little while lost in my thought with no one around, just me and God.

However, life doesn’t really allow for such flippant displays of emotion at the moment.  I guess I’ll have to add that on my list of why it sometimes sucks to be an adult.

I find myself feeling worn out lately.  In turn I have found it difficult to write much of anything here on this blog, but I always find it a source of catharsis to get my thoughts out and it can also double as a great place to have (or start) conversation so I find myself here once again.

The pastor at the church I attend has been preaching on the “seven deadly sins”, or (more accurately I believe) the seven core sins.  The series has been somewhat fascinating as I have never had a pastor speak on them in such detail and because I have enjoyed his point of view of them.  This past week he spoke of anger and some of the reasons people get angry.  The overarching reason was that anger happens when a goal/expectation is blocked by something/someone, and his example was that of someone being really hungry and seeing a beautiful apple tree with ripe apples that was blocked by a wall that could not be climbed over.

Most simplistic summary ever.

Anyway, he mentioned three sources of anger that are common, but I wanted to touch on one in particular because of my own experiences with it.

Probably one of the biggest reasons I’ve ever seen anyone get angry is because they have been hurt.  Whether it was through a bad relationship with a friend or significant other, or through a terrible experience with parents, etc. people tend to let their hurt play out in their anger.  Consequentially, this is also brought on by unforgiving attitudes as well.  How often do we say something just to be hurtful?

“Remember how you did ‘x’?”  “That was over 10 years ago, and what about ‘x’?”

Back and forth it goes in one vicious circle and nothing gets done except causing more hurt, and it is so easy to let that hurt fester and boil until it becomes a bitterness and resentment that is near impossible to hide.  I find a lot of people I know who are jaded about something have some bitterness toward it.  This also happens to be one of the forms of anger that I struggle with the most because I tend to internalize all of my anger and frustration because I find that exploding on others is more detrimental than helpful, however, if I don’t do anything to resolve my anger internally it will eventually lead to explosive anger so internalizing is just as dangerous.

I find myself under constant watch of myself lately because of this very tendency.  I don’t know if life in general has just been beating me up, or if I am slowly becoming a grouchy old man, but either way it requires constant vigilance to watch the words I speak, how I speak them, and to whom I speak them.  Oftentimes I fail, and the only thing I can do is thank God for his patience with me, stand back up and brush the dust off.

Anger is not inherently evil, or even a bad thing.  Even Jesus got angry (very angry sometimes).  It is all about how we channel that anger.  It can be a powerful tool that stirs us out of our slumber and into action.  And there are times when we should be angry, even outraged.  Sex trafficking makes me incredibly angry (and should do the same for you), slavery makes me angry, racism makes me angry, bullying makes me angry, any form of prejudice or hatred displayed to those who are different or you don’t agree with.  All these things bring a side of me that is not normally visible out.  There is nothing wrong with anger.

My problem (and all of you can probably relate on some level), is that I let me anger get the best of me at times and I end of saying or doing things that I regret later.  Because while I may have meant what I said, I may not have meant it the way it was said (such a fine line).

How do we deal with anger like that?  I know what I do personally, but I know there isn’t any one “right” way to do it.  I’m sure we could all agree that there are wrong ways to handle it, but what about the good ways?  Sometimes, my anger leads me to cleaning up around the house, sometimes it leads to my writing, and other times I just have to seclude myself in my room or somewhere and just listen to some music quietly while I exhaust my anger at the ceiling with my rampaging thoughts.  If I get to that point, I won’t leave my spot until my mind has calmed down sufficiently that I’m not thinking about the event that made me angry.

I find that this become especially true when dealing with others.  Sometimes my anger is justifiable, and sometimes I’m frustrated over the most inane thing.  For instance, when people leave cabinet doors open (anywhere not just at home) I feel a spike of anger.  Doesn’t make a drop of sense to me, but it happens, so I close the door and move on without saying much if anything, but other times something happens and my anger builds and I can immediately pinpoint the reasons why I’m angry and they are good, logical even, and just.  Yet, when dealing with people I have to balance whether or not it is worth the fight that would ensue if I bring up my anger.

Suffice to say most days I keep it to myself (and my wife too sometimes).

How do you deal with anger?  What are some of the reasons you get angry (reasonable or silly)?

Grace and Peace

Relationships with God and Others (Part 3?)

Have you ever mused over a relationship (or multiple relationships) and come to some kind of understanding of God because of it?

That's pretty much what happened to me the other night. My wife and I decided we need to take a break from the chaos that has become our life and after enjoying a pleasant viewing of a movie (Planes if you must know) we wound our way to a restaurant where we spent a while just chatting a little bit about everything. It was just a time to get away from everything and be with each other.

By the way, if you are in a relationship, days like this are essential.

Regardless, we were discussing some our frustrations with different people we knew and the more I talked with her the more I realized that the way I felt is very much how God felt when dealing with the Israelites, or more personally myself.

How many times do we take for granted what is given to us? I live in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife and sometimes I neglect to remember that God is the one who put me where I am today.

How often do I, complain about things that in the grand scheme of things mean nothing at all? How often do I completely ignore the blessings that have been bestowed upon me?

All too often.

To make a comparison: We are like a bunch of kids who are upset because we don't get everything we want, even though we get way above what we need.

For instance, I can think of many different people I've met over the years who would complain that their parents/significant other/friends don't care about them because they won't give them what they wanted.

Teenagers think their parents will never understand them and think they are horrible because they got an iPhone 3 instead of an iPhone 5. One friend might think another friend doesn't care because they don't agree on something. A woman may think a man doesn't care because he doesn't meet all the expectations (usually unspoken) she has of him or vice versa.

We are incredibly fickle people, and honestly when I encounter people like that it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. When I think about it I quickly find myself seeking forgiveness for doing the same with God.

Just think about it for a moment. The people of Israel are coming to the Tabernacle daily to offer this huge bloody mess that becomes a sacrifice to God who dwells in the Holy of Holies. They have been doing this so consistently that it has become a little trivial, and has lost the specialness that came with it in the beginning. People begin to offer prayers and offerings to God to get things they want. Petty things that have no significance on their lives. And God finally speaks up and essentially says, “Sacrifices aren't important to me, what is important is the heart behind them. I want you fully. I don't want just a part of you that comes to me to 'appease' me. That's not how this works. I expect complete, total, raw authenticity when you come to me.”

And then gain when speaking to the church later in the letter John wrote to the churches. “You're neither hot nor cold.” or You don't heal or refresh, you do nothing because you forgot me and why you are even where you are today. “Since you are neither hot nor cold, I will spew you (essentially vomit you) out of my mouth.”

Ever have lukewarm coffee? You know the way it tastes when you let coffee sit for more than ten minutes (unless you have one of those thermal cups)? Pretty disgusting isn't it?

Or how about a nice cold cup of chocolate milk that has sat out to long now isn't really hot either? So it's not as warm as hot chocolate or as delicious as cold chocolate milk, it's disgustingly warm (unfortunately I've had the displeasure of experiencing that one personally).

The same can be true when it comes to relationships: Parents with kids; friends; husbands and wives. There are times when someone's complaints or ungratefulness can feel a lot like a bad stench that permeates a room, or that disgusting lukewarm flavor that leaves a bad aftertaste and had nothing tasty about it in the first place.

I begin to see what God meant when he said those things. I begin to understand more his love and simultaneous frustration with people. We are so stupid sometimes and sometimes we are so brilliant.

I know we've all heard it a hundred times though.

“America is so blessed, we have so much.”

“Get your head out of your butt and look around you. You aren't suffering that much.”

“Need to get over yourself.”

While true, they are phrases that get a little stale, so it was interesting to experience it on a more personal level.

Just figured I would share my thoughts for a beautiful Friday.

Grace and Peace.

Faith in Relationships and God, Part 2

I suppose this is where the fun begins.

God isn’t like the rest of us.  Jesus wasn’t a guy who just didn’t get it.  If anything, he showed that he understood us so much better than we understood ourselves.  He proved that he loved the people he was with even though he knew their past, he knew their shame, and he certainly knew their hearts.

There is no deceiving God, no way to hide, no way to hurt; he always knows where you are, how you feel, and how to take care of you.

He is the only being in the whole of existence who sees you for who you really are, all the vulnerabilities, all the hurts, all the past mistakes, all the good, all the dreams, the hopes, the desires.  He sees it all and loves it.  More specifically, he loves you.

He. Loves. You.

Whether you reject him or embrace him, he will always be just a breath away.  He will not hurt you, and you cannot disappoint him.  There is nothing you can do to make him go away.

But he doesn’t invade your life either.  He allows you to make your own decisions and waits patiently for you.  He is basically exactly what we are all looking for and need in a relationship.

Might seem too good to be true, but keep in mind I mentioned what we needed in a relationship and not what we wanted.  They are incredibly different things.  And oftentimes confused for each other.

But think about it.  One of the greatest needs humanity has it to feel love and acceptance, and to have a sense of belonging.  It makes them feel safe, and it makes them feel important.  I think in our core, we all have a deep need to be significant.

And we are significant.  We are worthy of being loved.

To use an “overused” verse from John 3

“This is how much God loved the world: He gave his Son, his one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life. God didn’t go to all the trouble of sending his Son merely to point an accusing finger, telling the world how bad it was. He came to help, to put the world right again. Anyone who trusts in him is acquitted; anyone who refuses to trust him has long since been under the death sentence without knowing it. And why? Because of that person’s failure to believe in the one-of-a-kind Son of God when introduced to him.”

The point is, you are loved.

But what does that have to do with Faith in God?

Well, to really have faith in someone you have to trust them.  I personally find it impossible to truly trust someone without knowing they actually care about me and my well-being.  So, I felt that it was important to establish that God does actually care.

This is where it gets tricky.

See, I have found over the years that for me to trust others, I need to be trustworthy myself.  I need to exhibit the qualities that I desire to see in other people (within reason).  If I want my wife to prove she is trustworthy I must also be willing to put forth the effort in doing the same.  It is just the natural course of relationships from my own experience.

My relationship with God isn’t really any different.   There is still ebb and flow, give and take, and a need to show trust and be trusted.

This gets incredibly difficult when things don’t always go the way we expect.  Admittedly, there are days when I have felt that God betrayed me or hurt me on purpose, but I have to remember that despite how I feel, the reality is that God doesn’t do anything without purpose, without reason.  I, in my finite mind, cannot always understand the movements of an infinite being.

That doesn’t really make it easy.  If anything it makes it more difficult.  But I find that if I can shut down my pride for a few minutes then maybe I will begin to see that, as Solomon put it, “There is a season for everything.”  Sometimes we have to wait; sometimes we have to weather a storm; sometimes we have to make it through the tougher parts of life to get a little stronger so we can go a little further; and sometimes things are gravy.

Just like a relationship with another person.

I feel like, ultimately, having faith in another person, and having faith in God when it comes to relationships is really no different.

Furthermore, I would argue that they are actually intimately intertwined.

My relationship with God actually does affect my relationship with my wife and with others.  If I am being adamant in speaking with God, meditating on who he is, what he has done for me, and what he has to say both in scripture and in my own personal time with him then I find that my relationships with other improve immensely from it.

But when I neglect to do those things my relationships with others stagnate, I tend to be more irritable than usual and poor attitudes slowly creep into my core.

And I don’t want that.

I don’t want that at all.

Grace and Peace.

p.s.  Dear friend,  I hope this has helped you even a little bit.  If you want to discuss this more in person you are more than welcome to come find me.  You know where I live.  :)