I've been meaning to make a post for a while, but just haven't take the time to do it.
The truth there has been a lot of things going on in the past week that have either been a cause of high amounts of stress, or that have incurred some sort of sadness. However, despite those things the past week has been a good week, and I am thankful for a Father who never gives up on me despite the fact that I act like a total retard on a near daily basis. Thanks for forgiving me papa.
A few days ago, a friend's grandfather passed away. When I heard the news it immediately took me back to my grandfathers funeral that passed no more than 2 years ago. I can still readily feel, and imagine the emotions that I felt during that time: shock, sadness, happiness, joy, and love. I remember writing a poem that could only capture a glimpse, of a shadow, of what he was to my family, and who he was to God. I remember how up until the time I was given the opportunity to share it, I had felt no tears run down my cheeks, but after they would not stop. Like rain on a stormy day in Georgia, the tears kept cascading down my cheeks. From the end of the ceremony all the way to placing the casket on the stretcher above the hole that was dug in the earth. I remember thinking things like, "why am I crying, I'm not sad... I'm happy for him." I remember feeling just months before, that I would rather him either get better, or go home, because I didn't want him to suffer any more. I also remember coming to the realization, that I didn't get to know him as well as some of my other family and I am a little jealous of them for that. But over all, I remember that when I cried, it was out of love for my grandfather that the tears kept falling, and I couldn't find wrong in that, and why should I?
I feel, that in some small way, my friend is going through the same thing I did. Maybe not with those experiences, but with the concept that He loved his grandfather dearly, and just from interacting with him I can see he feels the same way in a lot of aspects.
So my friend, if you read this know that I won't claim to know how you feel, but I do understand how you may feel if its anything remotely close to how I felt. I love you bud.
Grace and Peace